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i'm the infamous kai

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dear WORLD [11 Jul 2009|02:30am]
[ mood | happiest ever ]

I love brittney wiedrick/barri more than prety much everyone in the world,
living with her is pretty much the koolest thing I've ever done.

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bobby chao for dinner then lunches. [07 Jul 2009|09:41pm]
I was perusing ONTD! again thinking that it seems like a TON of famous people had died this week, but then it occurred to me that there are really just too many famous people, and people who get to be called celebrities and get reported on, and it made me a bit sick. I have to say, if you need a letter to connotate just how famous you are (A, D, ZZZ), then you're thinking about it too hard. And here we go, with me contributing to the whole thing again (by reading, and thinking and giving a small shit about this stuff), but whatever, it's the thought that I had.

That's about as far as I think that thought is going.

Brit and Dan will be home Thursday, and I'm going to move this bed into my new room, and see fireworks, and on Wednesday I get paid and can feel safer (although it's all earmarked to pay Ian, and then MasterCard, the Bank of Mom will have to wait until my payday at the end of the month) and buy sheets. Yay!

This is only Tuesday night. What's next?
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haven't showered in days. [05 Jul 2009|02:49pm]
I'm still without a bed, but I've moved most of my stuff into the room in the basement, my room!, and have the golden stoner couch in here so I can relax, and also throw laundry onto it. SAIT should finally pay me on July 15, and I may spend most of that on a mattress for Brit's bed that Jess has been using upstairs, or I may buy my own bed whole. One thing is for sure, I can't stay on that soft mattress.

The pressure changes here are playing with my head, I woke to a massive migraine this morning and wish it would just rain. I want to see fireworks with Sasha but can't make plans.

Becca visits from Ottawa at the end of the month and I'll be glad that the population of cowboys is somehwat smaller by then.

I'm craving Bobby Chow but Erin says she's cooking tonight. All I have to do is feed the bunny (*shudder*), and for bonus points, I might even mop the kitchen floor. I'll mow the lawn tomorrow (famous last words).
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my idea of attraction comes from bright eyes music video. [13 Apr 2009|03:03pm]
It came out a couple of weeks ago (I think), but Jay Brannan's music video for "Can't Have it All" is badass, and I really like the song. If you've seen Shortbus, you'll recognize Jay as the gorgeous gayboy who completes the gay triad. If you haven't seen it, go out and watch it, and then watch the music video for Bright Eye's "First Day of My Life". It'll take some time, cause Shortbus is a feature length movie.

Anyway, it's my second day off in a row, and all I've done is more laundry. Oh! and I applied for a job in Calgary at WestJet. Only part-time but it could be something. Or it could be nothing. We'll see. At least I accomplihsed something. Now I still have to contact grandparents about leaving school and leaving the city, and no one is likely to be very happy. Eurgh.

Caitlin is really draining. That's all I'm really going to say, but it's all too much. Okay, I guess I said that too.

It looks nice out, but I don't buy it. I should go outside anyway.

I only work two days and get two more off. One of these days I want to see a movie. One of these days I want to create something beautiful. One of these days I want to live big.

I wish my insomnia were brought on by something fun, a creative burst, jetlag, lovesickness, but I'm so boring I can't sleep. What a bore.
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fuckish. [09 Apr 2009|11:54pm]
[ mood | fuck off ]

I can't get into either of my hotmail inboxes and I might be freaking out, but Caitlin gave me her cold and I think that's enough to stress about. There could be a room in Calgary as early as June, and that's perfectish.

Fucking weather and fuck this april cold. What the fucking fuck?

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sundaynightmondaymorning. [06 Apr 2009|12:43am]
I just had a great 51 minute chat with my mom in which the only guilt I had to deal with was my own, and none from her. I was pretty badass, and she was receptive to the idea of me heading to Calgary so long as I'm still in Ottawa when she visits at the end of May. Sure Mom, as long as I have a place to live. I'm not sure if Darcie is paying rent here, or if I can stay until the end of May, or where the hell I may go after that if I don't have a place in Calgary, but that's too much to think about right now.

Mom thinks I should apply for a job at WestJet as she's probably right. I think it's the ultimate in corporate whoredom, but it'd be fun corporate, not evil corporate, so I could take it.

Life, what the fuck.
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i hate today. [24 Feb 2009|12:21pm]
i'm not dead.

i haven't spoken to my mom in over two weeks, and i really need to tell her about school. i am again a drop out and she'll be oh so happy for me. funny thing is, i don't even care abut the big empty (or open for possibility) future ahead of me, i'm jsut sorry to disappoint her again.

i'm not sure what's next, and that's ok. but how do you make people feel ok with that?

Now that I'm stealing someone's internet at the new downtown apartment (that I've been in for about a month), the bad karma associated with all the downloading I've been doing doesn't even seem like it matters.

I haven't left my bed yet today except to pee. I went to the bathroom for that.
what a great day off.
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my week starts on friday [23 Jan 2009|01:10am]
I want to shoot myself for how much I've been sleeping lately, but everything except the last of the "little" things in my room at 29 Southview are all packed up and I'll hopefully get most of it downtown tomorrow (today) with the help of roommate Kelly. I work Saturday to Tuesday then have an appointment with Adrian to finish off my arm on Wednesday so I won't be back to Nepean before Wednesday, so I may as well have all of my stuff to get settled in. Of course, I have no tools to disassemble my bookcase, nor am I sure how I'll get the pieces downtown, but I may call in a "boy favor" from Nick. The bookcase is pretty central to holding my crap, but there is a lot more (functional) furniture and space for me at Darcie's, so I'm sure I'll manage.

This is all practice for eliminating stuff and packing to move across the country (or at least it can feel like that when I'm stuck for four days in Nepean.. yuck!), and I have so much crap. I was working on my resume really briefly tonight, but I'll have my printer downtown and can drop off a million copies up and down Rideau Street next week. With any luck, by the time shifts pick up at Culinary, I'll be too busy with a second gig to even get time to sleep. I need money and a litte peace of mind.

I can't wait to be downtown, I don't even feel like leaving the house, although I do love all the shovelling I do here. I'll miss the people of this house, but without a bus (and even with it sometimes), I can't stand being this far from life.

I can't wait for the new Lily Allen. If it's already out, I'm a fool. I've been listening to the new Fall Out Boy, and lots of old Matt Good Band, and some Violent Femmes. What if I am trying to be kool enough in my own Kai way?
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SHAMWOW [21 Jan 2009|07:22pm]

TFD Random Picture Generator
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life. [17 Jan 2009|10:30am]
what a mess.
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blauh. [11 Jan 2009|08:43am]
Dragging my ass out of bed on a Sunday morning is way harder than it should be.
Do I have to go to work today?
I just want to go back to bed.
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why the fuck not 2009? [05 Jan 2009|03:13pm]
[ mood | like rocking the fuck out ]

Hugs are better than drugs and they're cheaper! Making love is far healthier than waging war, and it's certainly more fun. Anyone who claims to have all the answers is most deserving of skeptical inquiry. Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day, but teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime. Unless that fish is contaminated with Mercury. Then you just screwed that guy. Change your underwear at least twice a week, chew your food thoroughly, wipe front to back, measure twice and cut once, leaves of three, let 'em be!

I really like incubus, I hope you do too.

I'm infecting Facebook with all kinds of personal photos to prove that I just don't give a fuck. If I'm leaving Ottawa, I think I'll work pretty immediately with Ben to do a half sleeve for the exact same reason. I also think I want "<3 mayhem > fun" on my wrist. But I'm still thinking.

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dear westjet [31 Dec 2008|03:23pm]
please dont' lose my luggage when I fly home tomorrow, I've been spreading the good word and I would love to have some clothing when I land home.

thanks!! YOU RULE
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2008, a year in review [28 Dec 2008|07:24pm]
"i'm not even supposed to be here today"

"I don't know if you guys ever got this, but I've heard a million times, that when people become teenagers they turn off their brain."

"If you're looking for a way to be really, really gross, may I recommend smoking? "

"I guess life can't suck if I can't find something to bitch about on here, but I'll say this: my bedroom is too cold (to the point that every morning at 6:30 I wake up, dig around in my half-sleep for the extra blanket and hoodie I keep within reach on the floor); and the bunnies that Mary brought home at Easter suck. "

"In an effort to build my karma account, I will not be intentionally stepping on spiders this spring."

"On Thursday I had to run home over lunch to grab my camera charger for Meika, and the 18-minute escape into the sun was exactly what I needed. "

"I am working every single day this month and yet somehow strangely optimistic about the possibilities of July"
"#27 - If you love someone, tell him or her. Forget about the rules or the fear of looking ridiculous. What is truly ridiculous is passing up on an opportunity to tell someone that your heart is invested in him or her" - Christopher Gutierrez, Bulletproof Hearts .A Guide to a Deliberate Life.

"Tomorrow is my last day of work and I'm out of here Sunday!"

"Not writing means I'm busy living right?"

"I don't know how to care about politics anymore."

"What if we all just got lost for a while?"

"I don't get why celebrity gossip isn't waking me up like caffiene."
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i'd like an everything massage please. [18 Dec 2008|11:59pm]
I hurt everywhere, and I am happy to be back in my bed tonight, but unhappy with being far away from everything.

I have done all the shopping that I am going to do in this province, and I need to finish wrapping gifts. Sunday, maybe.

I'll be in Edmonton on Monday. Fuckbeans.
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it gets better. [10 Dec 2008|01:23pm]
[ mood | improving ]

So, shoveling wasn't so bad, and Scott drove me to the grocery store for Brie (yay!) and laundry detergent (because my bottle is mysteriously empty, and I found it in the recycling this morning), so life isn't so bad. I've got OJ and enough smokes to get through today, and I'm going to watch Vacancy and then maybe sit on the couch.

Fuck yea Criminal Minds Wednesday, I just hate being stuck in the middle of nowhere. Especially without my phone.

I love how Vanity Fair make me wait for it. I've been anticipationg this issue, have read tons of clips, but still see Kate Winslet on newstands. This article "Would Tina Fey be a Star if She Still Looked Like This?", about the physical Tina Fey transformation is interesting, and so true. I know, right?

I'm going to paint my nails and eat Brie with Triscuits (cause I'm klassy). It's only 1:26 and I haven't completely failed yet today.

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when you stop growing, you start dying. [08 Dec 2008|09:28am]
I found my first gray hair today. I'm officially getting old.
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Um, WHAT?! [05 Dec 2008|01:27pm]
My credit card limit just jumped form $1700 (not so bad) to $5200 (very dangerous).
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only tuesday? [02 Dec 2008|09:08am]
I don't get why celebrity gossip isn't waking me up like caffiene.

I'm so not in the mood to go to work today.

I'm beyond excited about the design that Ben came up with for my tattoo on Friday, but it's a bit bright and sizable for my forearm. If I'm going to get trouble with it at Culinary (and I will), then I'll definitely get trouble with it everywhere else. Which is lame, but I can't change the world, so I guess I'll move the tattoo up my arm. It's more like a beginning for a sleeve than a standalone piece now anyway, but it's different than my plan. Maybe I'll get two hearts on my sleeve eventually.


I'm not complaining because I need the money, but getting one day off at a time and then getting three shifts in a row is kind of lame. Just a smidge, but enough. I'd almost rather go back ot Monday to Friday. *shudder*

I'm this_____close to letting go and I dont' want to, but I'll do it.
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I don't want to grow up [29 Nov 2008|02:16am]
and I don't want to behave.

I need to get a little crazy. After next week I have a ton of days off before I head to Alberta. As soon as I move in with Darcie, I need to get a job at 7/11. I think I could handle lots of nights.

I need to shake things up and shake things down.

My laundry is almost done, tomorrow I can clean this room and maybe start sorting some stuff out to pack. Maybe.
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